Tuesday, February 28, 2006

have an orgasmic experience with your ipod !!




ohhh...ahhhh...



The new ipod vibrator tops the list of the most eccentric ipod accessories. But for all the freak-a-deeks out there, it just might be the perfect gift!!!

Taken from TechEBlog's Top 10 Strangest iPod Accessories list via Kerry

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

nightmares

"All things one has forgotten scream for help in dreams."
Author: Elias Canetti
Source: Die Provinz der Menschen


I rarely remember my dreams. The few I do remember are usually gruesome, scary, and undeniably, are my worst fears come to life. Sometimes I wake up scared, not remembering the exact details of what I was dreaming, but more often than not, I remember every haunting detail...and it never fails to stick with me all day following.

Last night was no exception to the rule. I had a series of dreams which I just cant get out of my mind. They are haunting me.

Dream #1: I dreamt I was kidnapped by a neighbor (whom I can't place his face). He was a fat latino man with a tattoo on his chest of a skull inside a heart. I remember him breaking down my door and killing my dog by grabbing him by the neck and cracking it. He dragged me into his house, which I realize now, was nowhere near my current neighborhood.

Once inside, the stench of ass and mold engulfed me as I looked round the brown and green furniture. I tried kicking and screaming, but he taped up my mouth and took me into his bathroom. He went to grab a beer after he tied one of my hands to the handle bar of his bath tub with a rope. He got undressed, put water in the tub, and tried drowning me. I remember the feeling of water entering my lungs. All I could do is grab anything I could...I was able to grab his beer bottle. So I smashed it against his head, broke it in half, and stabbed him in the heart. Blood was everywhere. With a shred of the bottle, I cut open the rope and freed myself, cutting my hands badly in the process. I thought I was free. Then all I remember is hearing a gun shot from what appeared to be nowhere and seeing blood come out of my stomach...gushing all over my dog, who for some reason was at my feet, still dead. I cried, grabbed him, and died myself...


I woke up, freaked out. Realizing it was a dream and my pooch was snoring peacefully beside my bed, I was able to fall asleep a few minutes later.

Dream #2: I am in a hospital walking down hallways full of nurses & doctors. I seem to be invisible, kinda floating around...no one noticing or talking to me as I walked. I knew I was there to see my father. As I walked the hall, I am able to see people laying in their beds. I saw too many people, sick and lonely in their beds, looking at the hall in anticipation of friends and family they hope come to visit them soon.

I stop outside the room I am sure my father is waiting for me in. Tears start flowing at the thought of what I am about to endure; the scene I know will change my outlook on life, that will somehow define and/or scar me forever. I walk in to see my father smiling yet frail...pale beyond belief. I notice he is missing his foot, now a stub. And as I reach down to kiss him on his bald little head, he stares at me and dies...

All I hear is screams and its coming from inside my head. I pound the bed. I can't see because tears and sunlight have clouded my eyes. And as I look at his face, devoid of life, I faint.


I woke up and tears were still on my face. I must have been talking or something in my sleep, because when I awake my dog is staring at me like I'm on crack.

I get out of bed, wash my face and notice it is 2:45 in the morning. I smoke a cigarette. I crawl back in bed and fall asleep again.

Dream #3: It feels like a continuation of Dream #2. I am at my parent's house. We are sitting down to eat dinner. My father is absent. I know in my heart he is gone, dead. I never got to say goodbye. I never got to tell him thank you for everything he has taught me and gave me. My heart fills with sadness as I realize I am now a fatherless child.

This is when I wake up, shaking & crying. I can't stop sobbing, even though I know they were all dreams, not reality. All I can do is pray. In between sobs, I prayed like there was no tomorrow. Now, I am not an overly religious person, but this was the only thing that could calm me down. After about 15 minutes, tears subsided. But for the life of me, I couldn't go back to sleep. I stared at the ceiling for over an hour listening...to nothing.

I know the reason for all these dreams and it hits me hard. I may post the root of my fears at a later time, but for now: I need to think and deal with the issues here.

Undeniably, I am scared shitless and don't know what to do...

Friday, February 17, 2006

internal observation number 1

Why is it that I'm so hard on myself ?
Why, when I foul up, am I so disappointed in ME ?
Being an over-acheiver in every sense of the word, I hate the feeling of failure

I know everyone makes mistakes, and that its part of life. But, its especially hard for me to come to grips with the fact that my hands (or my words) did more harm than good.

Hours have passed and I am still fuming at my stupid mistake. While everyone else seemed so forgiving of me, I could not let my actions go without nagging myself with shoulda, coulda, woulda's.

I know all that negative energy can't be good for anyone, yet I can't stop from over-internalizing all my own fears and flaws whenever I fall in life.

Thus, my goal of the day is to realize I'm only human and more importantly just to Get over it!!

Thursday, February 16, 2006

the city of chicago does it once again

Excuse me while I vent, but I must share the fact that the department of water in chicago royally sucks the big one.

Yesterday I get my water bill: invoice dated 2/3/06, received on 2/15/06, and GET THIS: due 2/23/06, a whole $250. Now sit for a second a just think about that: they gave me a meager fucken week to pay the bill. And of course, if payment is late, I get slammed with late fees. In my opinion, THEY have some balls talking about late fees when they only give people a total of 8 days to prepare their budgets accordingly. What in gods name is that all about ?!! I have seen terms from loan sharks better than this shit.

While the water bill maybe not be as expensive as...say...real estate taxes, it still requires some additional budgeting on the average person's part. I seriously think it's all a conspiracy so the city can get a few extra dollars from all the late payments they receive. This practice is dishonest, extremely annoying, and it makes me mad to even think that our government is partaking in it.

What sucks even more is that I was doing so good with my budget this month. I had plans to pay off some of my debt early and maybe even buy myself some new shoes.

sigh...bye bye Steve Maddens

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Happy Valentines Day

Happy Valentines Day to everyone! :)

Even though today is just another hallmark holiday, enjoy it by doing something wonderful for YOURSELF.

AND REMEMBER: YOU'RE WORTH MORE THAN WORDS ON A CARD CAN EVER SAY

Monday, February 13, 2006

tag..I'm it !!

Being that I am incredibly bored this morning at work & that I was tagged by erinblog yesterday, here goes another meme to entertain me...er I mean you!

Four Jobs I've had:
1. I was a matchmaking consultant for an upscale dating agency (I actually was responsible for 2 marriages!!)
2. I also managed condos in the Printers Row area in Chicago for a year in college
3. I helped managed free after school tutoring for children in need
4. Now, I'm a marketing database manager at Kellogg School of Management

Four movies I can watch over and over:
1. Frida
2. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
3. The Notebook
4. City of God

Four places I've lived:
1. Chicago, IL (north side)
2. Chicago, IL (west side)
3. Chicago, IL (northwest side)
4. You guessed it, Chicago, IL (near south side)

Four TV shows I love:
1. Sex & the City
2. The Simpsons
3. That 70's Show
4. The Boondocks

Four places I've vacationed:
1. Cancun, Mexico
2. All over the island of Puerto Rico
3. California (San Jose, Los Angeles, San Francisco, Sacramento)
4. Las Vegas

Four of my favorite dishes:
1. Pizza, with extra cheese, sliced tomatoes, fresh basil, and sausage. Yummy!!
2. My moms Arroz con Gandules with pork chops
3. Slow-cooked coutry style ribs
4. Homemade chicken fajitas with refried beans, cilantro, salsa verde, and lots of veggies

Four sites I visit daily:
1. BBC
2. Craigslist
3. Google (search engine, news, and g-mail)
4. Several sites listed on my blogroll

Four places I would rather be right now:
1. In bed, sleeping, with my arms wrapped around my boyfriend
2. On a plane, set to go on vacation (anywhere warm please)
3. At home, playing catch or tug of war with my mutt
4. Ditching work and sitting in some cozy and quiet cafe drinking green tea and reading the latest edition of the reader

Four bloggers I am tagging:
1. Mickey Glitter
2. Curly Girl
3. Mexirican
4. Jacqueline

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Isn't it some kind of wonderful when the weather mimics your mood?

This morning I awoke cold from head to toe and feeling mighty bitchy at the world. By chance, it's blistery, cloudy, and snowy in Chi-town this morning.

That fact alone almost makes me want to smile...almost

Monday, February 06, 2006

if i was bush's momma

I'd slap him silly!!!

His $2.77 trillion budget proposal which allocates more money towards war than healthcare and education...is just backwards and ridiculously (excuse my french) FUCKED UP!! I mean, we have been in war for going on 5 years and I have seen nothing positive coming out of it (does anything positive really come out of war? Now that's a whole different conversation that I won't even get into right now). Given that fact, what reason do I, as an American, have to allocate more of my tax dollars to it? NADA!!!

Oh, I'm so mad at this prospect that I'm surprised smoke isn't coming out of my ears and ass...

Does anyone else have a serious problem that if his budget flies (which given his track record with congress, it probably will) the total federal debt would swell to $11.5 trillion by they year 2011? I mean, c'mon now!!!

I seriously think American citizens should have a say on this. I just don't trust Bush and his cronies to make the right decision. And, I'm afraid, we will all have to pay for his budget in more ways than one...

super bowl commercials

For those who missed the super bowl commercials, I found a great site to see them:

Super Bowl XL Commercials 2006

car blues

There must be some internal mechanism inside cars that urges them to stall, sputter, and/or not want to start once they hit 100,000 miles...in my opinion its probably something car manufacturers put in place to...persuade...people to seriously consider buying a newer model.

In any case, my old reliable 1996 Toyota has never given me any "real" problems over the last 8 years that I've had it. But like magic, it hit 1000,000 miles last week and since then - it's been taking it's sweet time to turn on; making me attempt to turn it over 3 or 4 times before it finally gives in and turns on. I know one thing for sure: it's not the battery, as its practically brand new. We've got a running bet on what the cause is: so far 2 people think it's the starter, 1 thinks its the alternator, and one thinks it's fuel injector. To make things that much worse, when it does start, for some reason, my speakers seem to come in and out whenever they damn well please.

Dammit. Now I have to take my baby in to the shop this weekend. I just hope it doesn't leave me stranded somewhere in the meanwhile. Most of all, I hope my car is just going through a mini mid-life crisis of sorts and all these issues are not a sign of even more horrible things to come in the future. Arrrghhh

Friday, February 03, 2006

yet another idea for a new show...

Being the weekend warrior that I am, I love watching HGtv. In the midst of watching Design on a Dime tonight, a thought crossed my mind: They should have blooper/ fuck up versions of their shows. Ya know: where they try to liven up a living room only to totally FUCK it up beyond recognition.

I mean...just picture it: the homeowner walking in the room with anticipation after they have done their work and instead of a look of awe and amazement on their face...horror and agony.

I would totally watch it!!

random thoughts edition #22

Its been one helluva a week and I find myself drained mentally as well as physically. I have so many drafts of creative and insightful posts which I wanted to put up, but for some reason can't seem to get through any of them this week. So instead, I bring you today's edition of the random thoughts of dragonflypurity.

~ Freedom Day was on Wednesday and with all this talk of the patriot act, an increase in governmental spying techniques, President Bush's nominations (Alito, among others), and our nations debt ratios - I feel less free now than ever in my life.

~ My car hit 100,000 miles yesterday (oh my). I've been thinking: Instead of calling my '96 blue corolla "Blue Demon" like I have in the past...maybe it should be renamed viejito (i.e. "little old man" for those who don't know spanish)? Wait, I have a Toyota...I have a good 50,000 miles more to go before I can rename it that, right ?!!

~ Any one else have issues with those toilets that auto flush? In my opinion, they suck. Mid wipe, it flushes all "under" you. ICK!! Sorry for any visual images which you can't erase. I just had to vent (they have them here at work so I am constantly fumbling with ways to stop them from flushing on me).

~ In other news: I'm seriously considering getting my masters in organizational change. Not only does the curriculum hold aspects of business, but also incorporates education, and psychology into the mix. What fun!

~ I'm supposed to be getting a dress fitted for my brothers wedding next weekend and I can't stop eating chocolate. It's like crack. Someone help!

~ Where in the hell did hip hop go? Lately, I have been on a hip hop hiatus. 3/4 of shit that comes out sucks and the other 1/4 gets played out QUCKLY. Suddenly, after a decade and a half of loyalty, I feel the need to diversify my listening habits.

nfl or nba ?!!

I just got this email a few days ago. Considering that Freedom Day was on Monday, I thought it was somehow appropriate. ENJOY!

Guess the organization these "outlaws" belong to ?

36 have been accused of spousal abuse
7 have been arrested for fraud
19 have been accused of writing bad checks
117 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least 2 businesses
3 have done time for assault
71, repeat 71 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit
14 have been arrested on drug-related charges
8 have been arrested for shoplifting
21 currently are defendants in lawsuits. and
84 have been arrested for drunk driving in the last year
Can you guess which organization this is?

It's the 535 members of the United States Congress. The same group of Idiots that crank out hundreds of new laws each year designed to keep the rest of us in line.