back to your regularly scheduled blog

I know I haven't been blogging with my usual frequency and passion, but life lately has been a series of obstacles and fucked up situations. Needless to say, I have been in a funk professionally, in my personal life, and financially. While a majority of the time, I'm happy...It's funny how depression cripples me so much. When I am depressed or angry, all my loved ones know to give me some space. I can be like venom, infecting everyone I come into contact with. HOWEVER, last night I really focused on releasing all this negativity; I meditated with a vengeance and partaked in a long relaxing slumber. Thankfully, it worked cuz this morning I woke up with a smile and a bounce in my step.

Rather than bore you with the details of the last few FUCKED UP days, I shall bask in the small things that have made me smile, made me thankful, and restored my equilibrium the last few days.

1) The new Roots CD is simply timeless. It has been in my cd player on steady rotation for a week and I can't seem to get enough of it. While some people may argue that The Roots are selling out and using more mainstream beats, I argue that they don't know anything about them at all. The Roots are all about constant evolution & experimentation; this cd is just further proof that they can take any type of beat and sound and make it their own. Anyway, my favorite tracks are "Star" (the very first track - which never fails to put a smile on my face), "Stay Cool" (with a sample of an old beat from de la soul) , and "somebody's got to do it" (with Jean Grae - one of my favorite female mcs of all time). Big ups to the roots for making me bump when my life was really in a funk...ha...ok that was cheesy, so lets just move on...

2) In times of need, you can easily find your true friends and realize the other 20 some people on your speed dial just are acquaintances. When I was all alone, saturated with depression and nowhere to turn after making 20 some phone calls to friends I hoped would hear me out...only one true blue friend was there for me. To that friend I send much love and positivity. Thanks for lending an ear in my time of need. You know who you are...BFL! BFL! FOR LIFE

3) Due to depression and a little PMS, this past weekend I have indulged in lots of food. More importantly: My moms home cooking....My mom can turn a frown upside down with just one whiff of her home made finger lickin’ ribs, or bistek con arroz y gandules. Its just simply fantabulous. Thanks mom: You rock.

4) Watching bootleg copies of new releases not only makes me feel like a militant, but also helps keep my wallet full (ok well not full, but at least I have gas money). Due to kind friends, I have seen Spiderman 2, Fahrenheit 9/11, and White Chicks all in one weekend without even leaving my boyfriends couch. Yeah to bootlegs!

5) While I am on the subject of movies, I won another set of free movie passes to see the Bourne Supremacy tonight at Pipers Alley. I can't wait & hope its just as good as the first.

6) While men are big pains in the asses at times, don't they look so damn cute in hats and boxers? Well, not at the same time of course, that looks a little strange. But truly, I am a big sucker for a man in a hat...adidas, nike, sports team, whatever, as long as its not PINK). Boxers are also damn sexy while briefs just look a little...too…well confining and girly for me. Damn what you heard, real men wear boxers dammit!

7) While this job is slowly making me insane, I have been sending massive quantities of my resume out. Anyway, I finally got a call back and have an interview on Thursday. I'm not going to jinx it in any way, but this job would totally rock. Not only would I be making more money, I would be helping inner city children get a better education. More details to come later. Just wish me luck!

8) The office move is currently underway in full throttle. We are just waiting for our new phone system to arrive and we will be out of this shithole of an office. I am dreaming of an office with a view and a lock on the door so I can dance to the sound of my own drummer.

9) Ok. I can go on & on today about positive thoughts and things to be thankful for. So I will end with an ode to meditation. If in 24 hrs: it can take me, venomous and PMSing, and make me cheery and gleeful, it truly is a great and wondrous thing. ahhhh....