my word cloud

I stumbled across this nifty website which scans the words on your blog and makes a word collage of all the most used ones. Of course, they use this tool to get you to buy your own t-shirt sporting the collage (gotta love it).

You can even change some of the words and replace them with others that define you more, if you wish. As for me, I think mine was just fine.

Go check it out!!!

spring cleaning...

Today I spent the entire day doing what every woman does when she's tense and in need of recentering and beginning a new life. I scrubbed, vacuumed, washed, and cleaned every inch of my house to a sparkly clean finish. In the process, I threw out 5 garbage bags full of junk and put together 2 huge boxes of clothes and books which I intend to donate. I sit back now and enjoy the scent of fresh bedsheets and my vanilla scented candle in the background...ahhh, what a wonderful feeling.

In other news, my asshole tenants are finally gone as of Friday night. I celebrated the occasion by consuming way too much alcohol. Another huge change on the horizon: Me & the boyfriend are planning to move in together. It's almost official (gasp). This is the greatest jump I think I've ever taken and I can't stop smiling.

Life is good!

whew!

I'm beyond happy that today's Friday. The day is almost over for me at work and my mind is already thinking about all the important things that need to get done this weekend, aside from catching up on some much needed sleep.

For over a week now, I have not been able to sleep for more than 3 hours at a time. Tonight, when my bastard ass tenants are finally out of my building (which I seriously hope they are), I think I will feel much better. For the record, I have to say that tenant laws SUCK! I understand their premise in protecting tenants from asshole landlords, however, they leave no room for justice for landlords stuck with asshole tenants. I really think they should maintain a middle ground of rights for both parties. But of course, they don't! It's a damn shame I have to go through all these steps and spend all this money (which I don't even have) to get those losers out of my building...all while they are living rent free. It truly rubs me the wrong way in more ways than I care to discuss here.

Anyway, my brother and his fiance finally put up their wedding website. Click here for my shameless plug. Doesn't my brother look like the cutest lil guero? Who would guess he's full blooded Mexirican? If you look at the media gallery located on the bottom of the main page, you will also be amused when you hear their twisted "wedding song". In the process of listening you can see tons of pics of family as well (including a baby picture of me). Truthfully, I still am in denial that he's actually going through it! Wow, we're getting old!!

sleepless in chicago

I can't sleep.
Whole body tremors.
I'm all alone...
broken in so many ways
I can never be complete again

Desperate thoughts
And sounds of my sink
Drop drop
Keep me awake deep into the night

I try to wipe it all clean
Close my eyes inhaling positivity
But where can minds go
When your all alone
Friendless and penniless ?

Emptiness reigns supreme

lollapalooza, here i come!

130 acts over 3 days!!

It's offical, me and the boyfriend have tickets to Lollapalooza. Whoo hoo!

for all those right brainers out there !

I found the coolest Visual Thesaurus today while lazily browsing the internet at work. It displays words and their synonyms in relationship to each other graphically. It even pronounces the words for you over the internet - perfect for those children struggling in English.



I love it! I simply love it!!!

word of the day: uncentered

Today is a day marked with scattered thoughts running through my brain, all trying to catch up to my fingers which struggle to type so fast this early in the morning.

I'm in yet another bout of depression. I'm in the process of evicting one of my tenants for non payment of rent. Throughout this whole process, I have a swarm of emotions which have taken over. I feel angry, heartbroken, flat-out broke, and even evil -throwing a young couple expecting their first child out onto the streets. I am a very reasonable woman, but this being a landlord thing is so much harder than I could have ever imagined.

Furthermore, tomorrow marks the third anniversary of the war in Iraq. A full 1095 days and almost $250,000,000,000 American dollars later...and sadly, the condition in Iraq is even worse than it was before our troops set foot on their desert ground. Tomorrow there will be an anti-war rally and march on Chicago's Michigan Ave which I am seriously thinking about dragging my boyfriend to.

With all this talk about life's purpose on Oso's and Amadeo's blogs, I have begun once more to mull over the meaning and purpose of my own existence. I have been on this earth almost 28 years and still - have no real idea of who I am. There are times which I look in the mirror and find nothing but love and appreciation for all my little intricacies, yet 10 minutes later I am face up against the wall wishing and hoping to be that stronger, more centered individual I know I can be. After a full 12 years of being in the workforce, I have never held a job where I actually woke up (most) mornings and was delighted to start the day and go to work. One thing's for certain, I have passion for those who I love and (most) days I have a passion for life. Today, though, I sit in my cube confused, sad, and questioning "could there be more?"

my verbal therapy

depression

sadness envelopes us all
waiting for our fall
so it can take hold
and
hold you captive all alone
but not alone.

It's a narcotic tricks your mind and heart to believe so
Just look around and see....no one.

julian beever...artist extraordinaire

I received an email from a coworker today which contained dozens of pictures of 3-D sidewalk art by an English cat named Julian Beever. The art literally jumps out to you when viewed from the right angle. Anyhow, I was so blown away with it, I had to share.



tell me, is that a real hole or a mirage ?


You can view more of his 3-D sidewalk art here

how free are we (really?)

In April there will be a new museum opening up in Chicago which will attempt to inspire and educate young and old alike about freedom (or lack thereof) in the states.

In fact, The McCormick Tribune Freedom Museum has already caused a stir by placing ads like these around the city.

Some interesting tid bits of info: The museum financed a random telephone survey of 1,000 American adults and found that only about one in four Americans (28 percent) were able to name more than one of the five fundamental freedoms granted to them by the First Amendment to the U.S. Constitution. Sad, eh?

But is our collective ignorance really that bad?!!! I found this random blog where a linguist breaks down the museums press release only to uncover what most sneaky marketers already know: word play can make all the difference in selling something.

Being that as it may, I plan on checking out the museum once it opens. In my opinion, it's a much needed fresh and inspiring idea. I just hope the museum doesn't try to sugarcoat the current realities of the American Dream by saying "there was slavery, then there was suffrage, then there was the civil rights movement...now....America is simply perfect!!" I think I just might puke.

Oh! The museum's website also contains a Freedom IQ test for people to check their savvy. (Click on "Am I free?" on the toolbar, then click Take the freedom quiz on the bottom right).

It's a shame that the woman's body is once again a legal battleground

picture from life and liberty for women


**please note the last half of this entry is from an archived post. I put it there to explain more in depth my feelings about abortion

I still can't believe it...South Dakota has officially ripped women living within its borders of their right to an abortion...even in cases or rape and/or incest. Obviously, they don't give a rat's ass about a woman's well being in the least bit. Talk about some extremist conservative bullshit!!!

My heart cries out in pain for all the women subjected to this crap before Roe n Wade, and even more so for the women living in South Dakota who will be forced to do their own abortions or leave the state just to get the procedure done. Bush and his cronies undoubtedly are beginning their plot to overturn Roe n Wade, this I am sure of.

Women of the nation, we must unite!! Please sign a petition to keep abortion legal in your state:

It's Happened in South Dakota - Protect Choice in Your State Now! Petition

(begin archived post)

Today women worldwide rallied for their reproductive right to choose abortion. While I may be pro life for myself, I am definitely pro choice for other women. I truly believe in a woman's right to decide what happens to her body and don't think the government, religious institutions, or even family members should have any say in whether she should have a baby or not. Its a woman's prerogative and since she is the one who will be raising and caring for her child, she should be the only one to ultimately decide whether she should bring it into the world or not.

Now don't get me wrong, I do not take abortion lightly, especially since I recently found out that my own life was almost put to a premature end through abortion. My mom seriously considered aborting me when she found out she was pregnant because my parents simply couldn't afford another child. Then, she simply fell in love with me, and decided to have me despite all the money issues. Of course I'm thankful, and this revelation gave me a whole new perspective on abortion...

...but I still think abortion is a woman's right and not a privilege. Many of these pro life activists judge and speak against a subject matter which they ultimately have never been forced to consider. I mean, all these people who call abortion murder obviously never had to deal with living in extreme poverty to the point that they are forced to nearly starve because they are obliged to give their children whatever limited amount of food they have. When they find themselves pregnant yet again, they are forced to make the hard decision on whether they can feasibly feed, clothe and care for another child.

These activists have never been in the shoes of a scared young single teenager who's "loving boyfriend" which she gave everything to (including her virginity) left her, with no support system, with no money to support herself, none the less support a child. While some may say she was stupid to begin with by getting knocked up, this is not a perfect world; sex is human nature and teenagers are increasingly sexual active. Even people who are protected sexually end up with babe 9 months later.

There are countless situations where women have to choose abortion over becoming a mother. It's not an easy decision for anyone to have to consider. It's a scary, sad, and very personal decision that no one has the right to control except the woman herself. Pro life advocates may call these women murderers and whores and insist that its necessary for these women keep their children, but they do nothing to help these women out. They can say what they want, but they will not help these women raise their kids, and they certainly will not provide any monetary or psychological support for these children. Shit, they are just trying to force women who OBVIOUSLY do not want or cannot feasibly have more children to adhere to their ideals and religious beliefs. What's worse to me, is that these children, if they were brought into this world, would most probably be raised in very undesirable and dire circumstances. This ultimately just increases the number of people living in destitution and just increases the gap of poverty in the US. Sigh!!

What I really don't understand about all these right wing republicans (i.e. BUSH & gang) is their wide support of the death penalty (is that not murder as well? I thought they were PRO LIFE), and their rollbacks on laws protecting the environment (are they not supporting the poisoning of us & all the children of the world by lowering these standards?). It's frustrating to me. If they truly wanted to get to the root of this problem and reduce or eliminate abortion, they should at least make birth control and health care widely available to all those who need it in the US. Maybe then, there would be a HUGE drop in the numbers of abortions performed. But of course, that will never happen...So I continue to say:

"To all the haters...its our bodies, not yours (so suck a lemon)"...That is all.